everything isn't meant to be ok, but that's ok.

After 3 days, it comes to an end.

3 days, 3 races, that's all you'll ever get.

3 days, 3 races, that's all you'll ever need.

It was quite obvious from the start, I'm not the best rower there is. Heats and semis, I strained myself to pull through. I knew that crossing those finishing lines only meant getting closer to the real deal. The finals. I soon found myself in it. No doubt competition was very strong but I could never really bring myself to admit that I was out of their league until the very end. No point in doubting myself.

In the end, they weren't so far away afterall. All the time I've spent, the sacrifices, rolled into less than five minutes of pure intensity. Still, a 6th position, I was defeated and so were some of my teammates but I'm sure we've really made our presence felt this time. But that already brings the team is already one step closer to the medals for the next batch. Already we've gotten into five finals with one medal in just our second year of A divs. Hope to see the juniors really excelling next year even after we've left.

How many times
Do we tire of all the little battles
Threaten to call it quits
Tempted to cut and run

How many times
Do we weather out the stormy evenings
Long to slam the front door
Drive away into the setting sun

Keep going on till dawn
How many times must another line be drawn
We could be down and gone
But we hold on

How many times
Do we chaff against the repetition
Straining against the faith
Measured out in coffee breaks
How many times
Do we swallow our ambition
Long to give up the same old way
Find another road to take

Keep holding on so long
Cause theres a chance that we might not be so wrong
We could be down and gone
But we hold on

How many times
Do we wonder if it's even worth it
Theres got to be some other way
Way to get me through the day

Keep going on till dawn
How many times must another line be drawn
We could be down and gone
But we hold on

-by rush

SAJC Canoeing

And then God set up this amazing sunset for us to bask in its glory.

About apologising

If sorry's no cure then I don't know what is.

Crushing day

damn it ming tuan you really suck you had one last chance and you totally screwed it up zomg you suck you suck you suck you suck you suck you suck you suck you suck.

i got pwnt today but i couldn't bear slamming myself in first person.

Coincidences

The odds of some stuff happening are like 1 to 6310864078146508917 but they happen anyway. Right down to the second.

Meeting familiar strangers, god likes to amuse me.

I'm doomed!

Refer to title.

Roll Out

Something evil's watching over you
Comin' from the sky above
And there's nothing you can do

Prepare to strike
There'll be no place to run
When your caught within the grip
Of the evil Unicron

Transformers
More than meets the eye
Transformers
Robots in Disguise

Strong enough to break the bravest heart
So we have to pull together
We can't stay worlds apart

To stand divided we will surely fall
Until our darkest hour
When the light will save us all

Transformers
More than meets the eye
Transformers
Robots in Disguise
Transformers

Autobots wage their Battle
To destroy the evil forces
Of the Decepticons

It's judgment day and now we've made our stand
And now the powers of darkness
Have been driven from our land

The Battle's over but the war has just begun
And this way it will remain til the day when all are one

Transformers
Transformers
Transformers
Transformers
More than meets the eye

Superduperawesome.

about the goodness of others

Sometimes, it's almost like I'm afraid of their goodwill.

my fickle friend

Zomg Lazer Eyez.

"Hi."

"kthx4scratch."

Zomg more Lazer Beamz.

Charging up Lazer Eyez.

Zomg Lazer Eyez.

"metry2brkintotishsenowkthxbye."

Not my cat. I think cats are just like people.

It's a crime

It's kinda like how rich people don't dream of a land of more money, but a land where everything can be bought with money.

shock

Sometimes, we believe in staying in the rut, thinking that the experience will do us good, that the suffering must be worth something and going against it isn't worth the trouble.

Then at the end some realise that it just totally sucked and they really didn't see the point of it at all.

On the way home

Too much stuff which I'm lazy to write, so here are some pictures.

When chickens attack

It's the sun

What's this doing here

Pots

Steps

TMT:

"Making the World a Better Place Since 1989."

I think that sums it up pretty well.

The Dreamers, Revisited

Students are citizens of school's grey land,
Drawing no dividend from time's to-morrows.
In these great hours of drudgery they stand,
Each with his feuds, and jealousies, and sorrows.

Students are sworn to the threadmill; they must score
Some flaming, fatal climax with their test.
Students are dreamers; when the class begins
They think of sunny fields, starry nights, and rest.

I see them in dusty classrooms, gnawed by fatigue,
And outside the headmasters' offices, lashed with the shame.
Dreaming of things they did with balls and bats,
And mocked by hopeless longing to regain
school-holidays, and picture shows, and spats,
And sleeping in during the rain.

-me

Based entirely off Siegfried Sassoon's "The Dreamers"

Extreme Power Metal!1!1!!!!111!!!11!!!!!1!!!11!!!!!

They play Melodic Death


But now for DragonForce:

The dragon from Dragonforce

Took picture of guy taking picture


Extreme Power Metal handsigns

Extreme Power Metal guitarists


This is like SO Extreme


Herman Li in focus


Extreme power metal shredding


Extreme Power Metal Keyboardist


And not forgetting the Extreme Power Metal bassist


Screaming something


Hong Kong boy

That was fun.

blablablah

"You look like you need some ice-cream."

And it really happened. Freaky.

picture and quote

"sometimes, words fail to describe what the ear never fails to hear"

I've got my tickets.

By Rush

It's called Bravest Face.

Though we might have precious little
It's still precious

I like that song
About this wonderful world
It's got a sunny point of view
And sometimes I feel it's true
At least for a few of us

I like that world
It makes a wonderful song
But there's a darker point of view
That's sadly just as true
For so many among us

In the sweetest child there's a vicious streak
In the strongest man there's a child so weak
In the whole wide world there's no magic place
So you might as well rise, put on your bravest face

I like that show
Where they solve all the murders
That heroic point of view
It's got justice and vengeance too
At least so the story goes

I like that story
Makes a satisfying case
But there's a messy point of view
That's sadly just as true
For so many among us

In softest voice there's an acid tongue
In the oldest eyes there's a soul so young
In the shakiest will there's a core of steel
On the smoothest ride there's a squeaky wheel

Though we might have precious little
It's still precious

quotation

Some one told me this a few months ago.

"If you're not serious, how do you know you're real?"

-GYJ

Err I don't know either.

mat rock

Took a cab home yesterday, the driver was some ex-mat rocker and the name Ray Anthony popped up. And what did I find out?

Ray Anthony LIVES. Somewhere. Out there. Amongst us. "Singapore's Hendrix".

Besides the revelation, I got some wisdom from the uncle too.

But

Hello rut, looks like I'm still stuck with you.

Training on Wednesday was exciting, because we caught a thief. thief. thief. thief. He had tried to walk off with one of our bags so coach chased after him and pinned him down, while we gathered round and offered unnecessary help and used his own handphone (wasn't his, it was stolen too) to call the police. Apparently the thief was some druggie who needed some quick ca$$$h for his fix.

I felt quite sorry for him though. It's like there goes the rest of his young adult life. And he had to endure harsh treatment, being pinned down by us with his hands behind his back and his head lying on one of our life jackets.

And that was for 40 minutes. Which was the time in took for the policeman (yup, one guy) to arrive. In a car. Another one came strolling into the scene, soon after and they offered their expertise handling of the situation, even inviting us to play a part in the proceedings by asking us to help stand guard beside the culprit.

Oh how fun.

mixed feelings

yup.

The people I met today

I was going to post a description of all the people I met today. But something hit me. Hard. Right in the face. Breaking news. And so there will be a major shiffffffffffffffft in topic.

It's over. All over. This time, it's for real. It was real sudden. Poof. Just like that. My life, gone. All I've come to know, taken away. Change. I'm afraid. But I'm also relieved. It happens in two days. What do I do? What will I say? How will I prepare? At every end there is a new beginning. Oh what the heck. Can't wait to see what happens anyway. Alarms are going off, sprinklers exploding.

My family is coming back.

and the winner is....

Pragmatism and Practicality.

Maybe one day I'll write a book on this.

clarity

I did it, I think. I stopped the internal dialogue, or at least a fleeting glimpse of how it was like to do so because the moment I realised it was happening, it was gone.

I could see, perceive, everything, but I saw that in the everything there was nothing. But the nothing turned out to be everything. Although I saw, I still don't understand. Maybe one day.

That's like, the only cool thing that happened today. And freakonomics is really just about us surrounded by people determined to rip us off.

the doubtless

We won on Friday.

I told you I wouldn't have cared if we lose because I never really had a doubt that we wouldn't win. You called it arrogance, I called it faith. Faith in other people because I didn't win. We did.

kbye.

blame game FTL

So I was like, who's to blame? I mean, it would be much easier to pinpoint the blame if getting C was a minority, I would just have to point to myself. But Noooo. Almost everyone else had to get a C too.

So does it mean we ALL suck? While others elsewhere all freaking PwN? Oh wells, whatever, like nobody cares anyways.

Came up with a song riff, which I sent to Daniel. Turns out it sounds freakishly similar to some song called golden hair sister by America, which I have never heard, at least consciously. Bleh I'm throwing it away.

Another flan

Coming up soon. No cream cheese this time.

+ I learnt a lot yesterday.

words from the foreign talent

I, S8917525I, TAN MING TUAN understand that being a permanent resident of Singapore, am liable for National Service and once enlisted for full-time National Service, will be required to complete it even if I were to renounce my permanent resident status.

alrightyz.

no doubt derric will have something to say about this.

flanflanflan

its 11.45pm and i'm baking a flan and there's school tomorrow.

Mark Twain defines work as "anything you'd rather not do"

I'd rather not go to school and I'd rather bake a flan.

But I'm going to school anyways because most of the time, life is about work.

poof!

And I Did It. Now I'm just looking forward to what's gonna happen next.

Disgusting People

I'm talking about litterbugs. The kind of scum that can toss a can or bottle into a bush, or onto the side of a path, without even batting an eyelid. I witnessed one such incident last night and the sight of the act really disgusted me. Is it really that hard to find a bin around town? Is it really that inconvenient to carry an empty bottle with you until you inevitably get to one? It doesn't matter who the person is, but the display of such a lack of thoughtlessness and consideration is what annoyed me.

So I reprimanded the person through a mixture of frenzied physical and verbal assaults, hoping to get my point through. However, maybe I didn't present myself as serious enough. The response? Not even an "oops." It was a more of a "So?" So you're already aware you're an ignorant, self-centered prick? Even if you aren't, that makes you one anyway. You might as well have said "So? I have no respect for anything beyond me because YEAA! It's all about Mememememememe!"

"What's wrong with littering and being an inconsiderate prick?" you may ask. Well, stupid questions deserve stupid answers. Here are some of the hazardous effects of litter on our society.











As you can see, this once beautiful beach got pwned by litter.



















These critters look really peeved. Don't EVER go to Virginia because they're are gonna f*cking rip your face off.















The grass here used to be nice. Until it got FREAKING PWNED by your litter.


















Everyone thought Bubbles was cute. But then one day, he decided it's PERFECTLY FINE to throw this pink SHIT on the floor while looking like a damn FAG. The result? His mom disowned him soon after. 6 months later, the butterfly got its revenge.














The figures for number of dyslexics were grossly understated.















Uh-uh. THESE KIDS aren't gonna put up with your bullshit too. Just try messing with them and see what happens.


You know what really grinds my gears? Litterbugs. However, that being said, I can be called a hypocrite too. After all, in the heat of the moment, I forgot to crawl into the bushes later to pick up the bottle. I'm filled with regret.

Thank God it's Christmas (Queen)

Oh my love, we've had our share of tears
Oh my friend, we've had our hopes and fears 
Oh my friends, it's been a long hard year 
But now it's Christmas, Yes it's Christmas 
Thank God it's Christmas

The moon and stars seem awful cold and bright
Let's hope the snow will make this Christmas right
My friend the world will share this special night 
Because it's Christmas, Yes it's Christmas 
Thank God it's Christmas 
For one night

Thank God it's Christmas, yeah
Thank God it's Christmas, Thank God it's Christmas
Can it be Christmas? Let it be Christmas 
Every day

Oh my love we've lived in troubled days
Oh my friend we have the strangest ways 
All my friends on this one day of days 

Thank God it's Christmas, Yes it's Christmas
Thank God it's Christmas, For one day 
Thank God it's Christmas, Yes it's Christmas
Thank God it's Christmas, Oooh yeah 
Thank God it's Christmas 
Yes, yes, yes, yes it's Christmas
Thank God it's Christmas, for one day

A very merry Christmas to you all.


This must be like, the most irrelevant, redundant, unnecessary, pointless post ever.

Or IS it?

nub pics

These are from the most awesome night ever, which was a few weeks ago:

The baldie is Sasha Bach. He is part of the Sasha Bach Band. There's also Brandon, the fan who's never heard them.
















The long-haired dude is Paul. He plays guitar and sings. He also plays super awesome guitar.
















I once again feel myself caught in the drudgery of school, except now I'm actually trying to do my work, which makes it worse. I still have so much stuff I want to accomplish outside of school, stuff that I don't mind working hard for, stuff that I see myself being able to immerse in for a lifetime (no not world of warcraft, that sucked.), but these are just flung aside by the education system. Leave the system? There'll be consequences. So I guess for now, I'm stuck in lots of ruts.

If I had to use one word to describe my day, it would be "meh?". Whatever I lost today, I have yet to find it again.

a weekend at the races

Today was also the day I fell off a truck.

It really hurt. Because I had one leg still on the truck, and one on the ground. This meant that I was suspended in what you could consider a vertical leg split for about a second. After my feat (or a stunt as the others called it, which I was quick to clarify later as completely unintentional), I found myself half-sprawled on the road because half my body was lying down while the other half seemed to be in a kneeling kind of position. I dragged myself up a kerb where I reflected upon how I had gotten myself into this mess and ways in which the mishap could have been avoided. I could find no answer.

For the third time today, I was a victim. A victim of circumstance.

At least I got a free T-shirt today.

Hey can you hear that sound?

It's the sound of apathy.

ujetynghjdygh??

Spot the Buddy Guy:








These cats are totally awesome. Didn't catch a pic of them climbing up the bamboo plants to feed on their juicy leaves though. It was just like the pandas. In China.









Went to watch the Sasha Bach Band on sat night. Turns out there was NO Sasha Bach. They got cancelled or something. Kinda disappointed so we went to the esplanade to watch the free shows. There was this really grim, grave, sad, emotional, deadpan dude playing radiohead and classical stuff with his band. He sounded like a choir boy but put his falsettos to good use. Great musician. Then we went to Harry's to watch Paul. Stayed for 2 sets. Highlights for me were his rendition of Misty, Mustang Sally and the last one i saw, Hotel California, which he ended with a killer outro (warning us before hand not to try at home or risk bloodshed) involving a thumb movement of extremely high speed (almost vibrating) and a seemingly impossible to coordinate melody line. We left satisfied.

School today. The new time table is way better than before, my latest lesson for the week ends at 3.30pm. Got back physics, B, exceeding expectations but nonetheless felt that I could've gotten an A if I had done a bit more work. Got one of my four lit papers, which i scrapped an E. Not hoping for much though, these are probably the best results I'll be getting for this BT.

I also borrowed some books from the school library too. It's only the second time I've done so, according to the helpful volunteer librarian at the counter who offered that interesting bit of trivia without me having to ask . Borrowed King Rat, Animal Farm and The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. Books which I've been wanting to read for years but never really bothered to get. Couldn't find Ender's Game though. Well, it's time to catch up on reading, which I haven't really been doing actively for a couple of years.

Oh and I conducted a bunch of character analysis experiments too. Turns out I was right, although I wish I weren't. Oh well that's peoples for you. Sometimes you try to find something more inside them, but they're are just exactly as they seem to be.

the tokyo ska paradise orchestra

So on Friday, we decided, "hey let's pay $42 to go watch this awesome looking jap ska band tomorrow that we barely know because they look kinda cool." And it was worth every cent. Their kickass show can't really be described in words, just pure awesome music and energy, probably the one of the best live performances you can possibly watch, regardless of what music genres you like.

Shitty pics of the free live shows before that:

The Sasha Bach Band. Really good playing and all their stuff were originals. Mostly mainstream-ish modern rock, but without the suck, which means they rock. The band members are all talented musicians too. Guitarist sounded kinda satriani-influenced with his riffs and the rhythm section was solid stuff. I thought Sasha Bach was a weird name for a band. Until later.









Barbie Almalbis. (On the right) Pretty pinoy singer-songwriter playing to an 80% male audience. Decent poppy music, although the bassist (on left) was absolute shit and ruined all the songs with his shitty overpowering tone. We left soon after.










Went to watch Paul Ponnudurai again at Harry's bar before and after skaskaska. Was even better than the previous night's. Off the top of my head I remember him playing his renditions of girl from ipanema, day tripper, sesame street, a rockabilly number and some jazz stuff. The sasha bach band was around too and the drummer went up to jam with paul in The Best Jam Ever. They really had the swing going on and the drummer had great improv skill to keep up with Paul.









Met the Sasha Bach Band after Paul's performance, who are super friendly people. The front man introduced himself as Sasha so I went "Oh, you're the Sasha in the band name" and asked who was "Bach". Turns out his name was Sasha Bach, to both of our amusements. Well, that's Danish names for you. Danish people are so cool.

We also talked to Paul for abit, introducing ourselves as his new superspecialawesome fans. He said he used to play with Tommy Emmanuel quite often in the good old days, no surprise there although I wish I could've seen that.

Need a better cam-phone.

mosaic part 2

ZOMG THE BEST FUCKING AWESOME NIGHT EVER.

Damn right I've got t3h Blues

It was quite an amazing night I guess. Met up with Glenn and Bran for dinner first at the ripoff hawker centre beside the esplanade. Watched a couple of cats imitating pandas by climbing up the bamboo shoots and eating bamboo leaves, though they jumped off before I could snap a shot of them.

Arrived late for the concert, while Buddy Guy was blazing through his first song. 1 and a half hours of intense, stone cold red hot blues passed by really quickly but it was really worth every cent. Going from barely audible whispers into a volcanic solos. That sure was bluesy. The emotional screams from the soul (emotional, not emo) without using the mics. That sure is bluesy.

Trading solo phrases with the keyboardist, letting the 2nd guitarist have a shot at a lengthy intense solo which also show cases his amazing spinning guitar strap trick, walking out into the audience and sitting down amongst them and then going all the way up to the second floor to play in front of people and letting some random girl to help him with his solo? That sure makes an awesome show.

I'm not an avid listener of his recorded stuff but yea, definitely amongst the greatest performers around. The keyboardist and 2nd guitarist were also really decent players.

After getting our minds blown out we went to find more live music to satisfy our hunger and we weren't disappointed. Ernie Halter, some singer-songwriter guy was okay. Then there was this indie jazzy band over by the bay playing their last song. Then we walked past Harry's bar and saw the Paul Ponnodurai poster. I've seen him on the net. Glenn has heard about him. It was about time his gig was starting. Ok why not? Let's ignore the fact that it's 10pm and I've got canoeing competition tomorrow, Glenn and I should be studying for our block tests and Brandon needs to get home.

It was 2 hours well worth it. An amazing act of a man with a piece of wood with six strings and songs to sing. A virtuoso at guitar playing and amazing song arrangements. Halfway through, Marty and Rick, the keyboardist and guitarist from the Buddy Guy Band came in to watch. In awe. Minds blown out again. He played Sweet Home Chicago for them, then went into more great songs, ending with his very own rendition of... Sesame Street Theme Song, which was indescribably cool. Got to greet him after the set, which was cool since he's a friendly guy but awkward since he was probably much more interested in meeting the two big shots behind us.

Oh and we decided to watch Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra tomorrow.

Canoing competition tomorrow and Sunday Hoorayzzz! Block test on Monday! Double Hoorayzzz!

ieh?

Duck!

Huh? Wher--- oof.

A misunderstanding often results in tragedy.

Moving on to a totally unrelated topic, I'm still hungry.

13 hours of irony

That was today. It was Quite surreal.

Almost everything that happened today was tinged with irony. Conversations, situations, actions, sights, sounds, everything. what I told people was ironic. What people said to me was ironic. What I noticed was ironic. The events of the day were ironic. It had also nothing to do with the lit test in the evening, which was another irony on its own due to me not being able to complete both papers and not having enough time to cover any ironies of the text.

The last conversation I had before I reached home was the most ironic of all. And the irony didn't end when i was back in my living room.

And can fake people ever be real too? The search for the answer(s) continues.

my brother

sometimes i envy people with good older brothers. the ones who teach you stuff, help you out, share their things with you.

selfish, jerk, unkind, slob, self righteous, armchair critic, hypocrite, mean, unhelpful, inconsiderate.

that's my brother for you. in my opinion anyway. of course, who cares about what my opinion says? maybe i've misunderstood him all this while. maybe other people say he's cool, kind, nice, friendly and compassionate.

but then again, my opinion is the only thing i've got about him.

i'm totally looking forward to my family coming back now. then at least i won't have to be alone with this jerk. i'm sorry.

anyway i got a D for chinese . shouldn't be so proud of it but worth a yay anyway.

yay.

i'm a pretender

do i have to pretend that i don't care? do i have to pretend that i don't understand what's going on? do i have to pretend that i don't notice? do i have to pretend that i don't bother about those things? do i have to pretend i can't see it? do i have to pretend things are just the way they were?

yes. because i'm a pretender.

anyway, chinese results coming out tmr. DON'T WANT TO FAIL.